How to get started on overcoming the selves

How to get started on overcoming the selves

If you are new to following a systematic path to deal with the selves, it can seem confusing and overwhelming to figure out how to get started. This article aims to make it a little easier.

It is likely that you already have some motivation for studying the HAP teachings, such as a particular issue in your life that you would like to change. If so, go to the second heading below.

Determining what issue to work on

If you do not have a specific issue in mind, here are some suggestions for determining what to work on. First of all, seek to narrow things down to as specific of an issue as possible. Naturally, you can say: “I want to raise my consciousness,” but that will take time and thus it is harder to measure your progress. It is more manageable to say: “I want to overcome my anger issues.”

Your physical situation

Look at the physical circumstances in your life. Do you find that there are certain situations you encounter again and again? Do you sometimes wonder: “Why does this always happen to me?” Or perhaps: “Why does this never happen to me?”

You can also look at your general situation in life and ask yourself: “Why did I choose to be born in this situation? Is there some psychological issue that I wanted to force myself to confront by being born in this family, sex, race, ethnic group, nation?”

Do the people around you have some psychological issues you can see? This doesn’t mean you have the same issue, but you could have. It could also be you wanted to force yourself to overcome the reaction you have to people with this issue.

Your emotional situation

Are there certain emotions that have dominated your life, such as fear, anger or a tendency to feel embarrassed? If so, try to step back from them and ask yourself what you fear or what makes you feel anger? Try to be as specific as possible. Perhaps see if there is some worded statement behind the feeling, such as: “I feel angry because . . .”

Naturally, feelings can be general, but they are often triggered by specific outer situations. Thus, you can look at your reactionary patterns. Are there certain situations that trigger your dominant emotion? Are there certain people who get you to feel a certain way?

Your thinking

How does your intellectual mind react to certain situations? Do you find yourself going over a situation again and again, obsessing over what happened and what you could have done differently? Any tendency to obsess over certain issues points to a reactionary pattern.

Can you link such a pattern to specific emotions? Are there certain thoughts that trigger the emotions? Or do the emotions trigger a chain of thoughts? Can you discover a thought pattern linked to the emotions? For example, are there certain things you feel should not be happening in your life or that other people should not be doing?

Are there certain general thoughts you have about life. Do you feel overwhelmed when confronted with a situation that seems difficult to solve or that seems to force you into a certain reaction? Do you often think: “I’m tired of . . .” Or do you have other thoughts that often come up?

Your identity

It is usually much easier to look at actions, emotions and thoughts, whereas looking at your identity comes later. There are more teachings on this in later sections. When you are ready for this step, you can consider what kind of identity you were brought up to have in your family and society. Here are some examples:

• Were you brought up to see yourself and your group as being in opposition to another group of people?
• Were you brought up with a certain ideal of what it means to be a man, such as a macho man.
• Were you brought up with a certain ideal for being a woman, such as being a mother , a good housewife or subservient to men?
• Were you brought up to see yourself as coming from the poor part of the population and accept limits to what kind of abundance you can have?
• Were you brought up to see yourself as a sinner?
• Were you brought up to accept certain limitations for what you can do in life, such as getting an education or starting your own company?
• Were you brought up to see yourself as a limited being, especially in terms of raising your state of consciousness beyond what is considered normal in your group?